From: RTB's phone
To: A blogger of this parish
Date: 08/07/08
Time: 02:16

I have set one alarm. Late. And I can't be arsed to get undressed. Hurrah for Friday! Balls to work! xx

....

From: RTB's phone
To: A blogger of this parish
Date: 08/07/08
Time: 08:11

Ugh. Don't. I can't open one eye.*

* Rumours that copious amounts of red wine may have been consumed during the night before these texts were sent, as part of the celebrations of meeting up with two good friends again after a six-month absence courtesy of them spending six months travelling around South America, are completely unfounded.**

* * For "unfounded" read "accurate beyond the shadow of a doubt".