Line manager had enough of my cheek and about to sack me?

Nuclear bomb about to drop on my flat?

Gypsy curse from the woman whose heather I refused to buy in 1998 finally kicking in?

Hitman hired by my millionaire ex-husband, whose life savings I ran off with and then squandered on a stockpile of chocolate and red wine, managed to track me down?

No.

The charger for my mobile phone is refusing to work.

Noooooooooooooooooooooo!!