A friend of mine has just been to see his union leader at work.

His complaint is that he believes he should receive permanent employment rights, which most people are automatically awarded once you have worked for the organisation consecutively for over a year.

Which he has done.

Except that during this period he has been employed - back-to-back - on three different short-term contracts, rather than one long-term one. So management have decreed that he is not entitled to permanent employment rights, although they also don't want him to leave, because he's the only one in his department who does any work and are offering him another short-term contract.

He met the union leader - who was, rather unnervingly, wearing some kind of Mexican poncho outfit, even though he's not in the slightest bit Mexican - and explained the situation.

And was asked: Do you have something that we could use?

Are you disabled?
Are you at all ethnic? weird phraseology
Are you a woman?"

"Er, no..."
"Can't you tell??!"

Hm. Then I'm sorry, but it's going to be verrrrry difficult for us to do anything for you.

Obviously, my friend is now off to do the following:

Book himself a sex change.
Scour his family tree for the merest hint of a drop of Welsh blood.
Throw himself under a bus.